The hardest part- Introduction

I’m sitting here thinking, Oooh Lord! Am I really doing this? Well, every motivational book I have read and every video I’ve watched says “Step out of your comfort zone” or “The first step towards your dream is a step in the right direction” not forgetting, “Start and fail, but start anyway.” So…here I am.

So, who am I? I am half Kikuyu and half Kalenjin (half cast or point five if you like hahaha). I have a taste of both the loaded and the broke life. I was raised by a single parent, my mother. I have 3 older siblings who are all Kikuyu by the way..(yes, I told you my life is completely worth hearing about) meaning, I am the only Kale in my family. I am a marketer by profession. I have no hobbies I can honestly brag about like art, cooking or singing. I can draw stick figures, whip up some scrambled eggs and sing in the shower. Hope I find a husband who accept that hahaha.

For starters, I will tell you of a story that I know most of you have not experienced. Well, 4years ago, during a long weekend, my brother came up with a brilliant idea to go support his friend who had opened up a bar at Eastleigh (Isili). The guy had some nyama choma for us and we were pretty hang over from the previous night. So, we went there and had a pretty good time. We later decided to go to a place closer to home. One of the guys there offered to give us a ride to our destination. We got to the car and it couldn’t start! I was so irritated so I sat on a pavement and watched the guys try to jump start the car.

I figured they had taken up so much time (rather the liquor in me made me think it took hours)…so I thought, if I helped them push, the car would start! I walk right up to the middle and start pushing with them and in a split second, I disappeared! Looking around me, I was underground, in a manhole. Really, really deep one for that matter! I screamed at the top of my voice for help. I looked around me in the tunnels and saw rats running around me (I hate creepy crawlies-cringe) and human waste! I kept praying amidst tears that no one flashes a toilet or no wave of water comes flowing and sweeps me away!

The taxi men and watchmen gathered and grabbed each other by the feet forming a chain to rescue me. They finally got to me and pulled me out. I was received with a quarter bottle of vodka to help with the trauma and the seriously sprained ankle. Then I had to sit through stories of how “I was there, then I wasn’t!” Literally pulling off the disappearing act, hahaha! I thank God for no rain, the PARTIALLY DRY HUMAN WASTE and the busy Eastleigh night life that day. I only lost a shoe! Hope that condom shoe goes to shoe paradise. It served me though! Tafadhali serikali, zibeni hizo man hole! Lesson: Watch out for man holes in Eastleigh!

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20 thoughts on “The hardest part- Introduction

  1. Nice read. I feel i want more about this story….like how you are pointie yet dark skin, could it be you are a mix of a Kenyan and a Kenyan diasporan out for further studies (just for gags), like the dude who claimed to have single handedly rescued you after you were out (makmende style), and maybe trying telling the truth of how not so dry the dry human waste was, how you were stinking afterwards even hell would deny you entry…..lol Well done Chemu

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  2. Good work Chemu…..uve made me laugh my heart out this morning….reminded me of the Eastleigh story….pole sana…its true this blog thing is yours….

    Like

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